*~Weird stuff that happened to me yesterday~*
- I saw a homeless man get hit by the CBC news van. When the van impacted, the man flew back, and like in a cartoon, about 20 syringes went flying into the air.
- I finally found parking downtown, but I forgot my credit card at home, and the machine didn’t accept change. I found someone who was leaving the lot and asked for them to purchase me a ticket in exchange for my cash. He said “it’s your lucky day,” and gave me his ticket which was valid for a few hours more. I said “Thanks Hero!”
As he left, he pulled up to me and asked how we know each other. I was confused, and explained we had met only moments earlier. He said “ohhhh, so you don’t know me. I was confused. My name is Hiro.”
- Lastly, as I was leaving that same parking lot, I went down a sketchy alley. I was driving, and this guy was hunched over his bike, I thought he was high as fuck. And I couldn’t pass him. At that point, a scary guy came out from behind a dumpster, thug as hell, and helped me pass around the guy. Guided my car.
I was like, oh wow, thank you kind gangster. And as I pulled away, I saw another five guys in balaclavas come out from the drainage doors and beat the living shit out of this guy and steal his bike in my rearview mirror.
I got to the main street, saw a cop, told him what happened, and just at that the guy who helped me get around bike guy, was poppin sick tricks and speeding away on bike guy’s bike.
Did I ever tell you about the time this kid slid all the way down the Granville Station escalator (which is HUGE), bailed at the bottom, stood up, did the double peace and yelled “YOLO.” I love life.
Thank god I don’t have to work for 420. Because a block away from my restaurant, Vancouver looks like this,
and crepes look like this.